Personal Challenge Day 1.5

Technically, day 2 is tomorrow. So today is day 1.5.

Went to the salsa club again and am glad that Vivian told me I improved tremendously! Was feeling super bloated after dinner though, got some ginger tea from Jackie hoping it will relieve the bloatedness, but no go. Anyway, didn’t affect my mood. Vivian introduced her friend to me who made me do all the moves that I have never learnt before. I had fun. πŸ™‚

I think I’ve almost conquered the fear of moving around in front of other people. Many thanks to my patient and lovely colleagues. πŸ™‚

Personal Challenge Day 1

Not regretting it, but it was damn stressful can! Roomful of strangers, watching myself move around in the mirror and instructors that aren’t strict enough took a toll on me mentally. Also, other things that make me uncomfortable have been happening around me. Objectively, I know that I will be able to overcome all this, but I cannot control my emotions, so…ya, I need to write it out.

I like to do what I want, but doing whatever I want seems to be making people around me unhappy/worried and I dislike it. So I become more reserved and don’t do what I want, but I end up feeling like crap at the end of it. It’s that same struggle again. Being happy and making people around me happy. I really need to stick to my resolution and make myself happy first. Everybody else comes secondary. Gotta be a little selfish in order to be happy.

Crazy Batam Getaway Day 2

Had another crazy drinking night where I passed out on the sofa, then woke up and continued drinking by the beach. Then back to the villa and slept in the spare room, then woke to find Shruti sleeping on me, so I gave her the bed, and then I slept again in our bedroom upstairs. We woke up, Shru and I cleaned up the place and the other people made breakfast for all of us. Yes, I am pretty useless in the kitchen and Saturday melted into Sunday. Haha. We checked out after eating and headed home. After we got off the ferry, I stood on the baggage trolley thing with all our bags and Terence ran and pushed me along. Hahaha. It was crazy cos I wasn’t facing the front. After I shifted and sat front facing, there was no more space to run anymore. πŸ™

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Crazy Batam Getaway Day 1

Went to Batam for the weekend with my crazy colleagues. 6 of us booked 2 nights stay at Nongsa Village. We started planning for the trip with the wrong-est focus – drinking. On Friday, we brought lots of mixers, 4 bottles of alcohol (Vodka, our favorite Chivas, Cointreau and Rum), 4 packets of cup noodles and bags of chips there. It was an absolute disaster, the kopitiam at TMFT was closed, the food stall after clearing customs was selling non-palatable food and the villa turned out to be really out of the way with no restaurant there. Luckily, I shared a box of beehoon with Jackie on the ferry and Shruti’s cup noodles after my shower. Needless to say, after shower activities is drinking. Haha. I survived the first night until daybreak, then slept in the spare room cos the air-con in the bedrooms were too cold.

Saturday was awesome, but the villa’s ulu-ness really got to us. No restaurants meant no breakfast. And also, they charge SGD50 for a two way ride to a place for 3 hours, or SGD45 for a one way ride out. Trying to milk their customers due to how ulu it is. We waited for everybody to get ready, then walked to Turi Beach Resort where we could hire drivers for a better rate (I stayed there previously in Dec). Hired two cars for the day and we started off with food and grocery shopping at Nagoya Hill. Then to Waterfront City for some sea activities. We paid for a 4 person package deal for para sailing, jet ski and banana boat at SGD50 per pax. We could also add on additional people to any of the individual activities if we wanted. Para sailing was nice, and I got dipped in the water (Vivian and Shruti were dry!). Everybody insisted that the boat driver did it of his own accord, but I don’t believe. Hahaha. Jet ski was lousy la. I had a head start, but I suspect my jet ski’s max speed is lower cos Terence managed to overtake me at 1/4 into the route. It was quite funny. The instructor sitting behind me trying to push the speed up, but it was already max. Banana boat was awesome. The speed boat driver was trying his hardest to capsize us, we countered his efforts by shifting out weights around. Hahaha. He took a long time taking us down, but it was fun. πŸ™‚ There were two really cute dogs, an unfriendly parrot and a quirky monkey at Waterfront City. The monkey is really cool and was always asking for ice cubes to eat. The weather was too hot for her. We ended the day with more grocery shopping and a seafood dinner at Rezeki kelong, where only the fish was nice. 😑

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Jill Stuart

Discovered JILL by JILLSTUART and JillStuart today cos I received a pair of Jill Stuart sunglasses as a gift. πŸ™‚ And yes, it’s bling cos I picked it out. Haha.

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P.S. Seems like all shops are having 20% off shades, so go get yours if you want one.

Feeling Kinda Useless

I was in the toilet in my parents’ room when my mom said that she was feeling faint. So I asked her a series of questions, “Have you had enough sleep recently?”, “Did you intake enough sugar?” and so on. All checked out ok. She suspected that the inner fluid in her ears is causing her to feel faint, I told her that if that is the case, you would have vomitted already. Then she said that she wanna go see the doctor. I offered to go with her. She declined, saying that she’ll go with dad. Then dad rolled over on the bed and sorta woke up (he was trying to sleep earlier). I lingered around in the room as I put on my nightly facial care products, then when I was done, I asked her, “so, you wanna go to the doctor’s?” She said, “it’s ok, I can go with your dad.” Which dad also agreed to, and they promptly asked me to go sleep.

I feel… kinda useless, somehow.

I really didn’t mind accompanying her to see the doctor if need be, or even to take urgent leave tomorrow morning cos of this (though that would be such a major sabo to Vivian. :x)

Gran Torino

I watched Gran Torino today and found it to be a very meaningful movie. I haven’t had the time to check out the trailer or read the synopsis beforehand, was wondering what to expect when the movie began. I decided to watch based on PK’s comment that it’s a deep movie, and also at my movie kaki’s suggestion. He heard that the movie’s very good. Spoilers under the cut.

Continue reading “Gran Torino”

Of Challenges and Comfort Zones

nickpan gave me a challenge – to make Pipe Dream the first result when chufang is entered as a search keyword in Google. Currently I am the third result listing out of about 138,000 results for that keyword. I just edited some things on the blog, we’ll see whether the listings shift at the end of the month. πŸ™‚

I have also given myself another personal challenge – to broaden the boundaries of my comfort zone again. As mentioned in the Facts, Habits and Goals meme, I don’t have confidence in activities that involve a lot of people watching me moving around. Which logically, makes dancing one of these activities.

Was introduced to Salsa dancing by my colleagues last year, and they have brought me to a Salsa club twice ever since. Tonight being the second time I went to the club. It was more crowded than the previous time we went there, and frankly speaking, I was such a stressed out ball of nerves. Haha. Previously, MZ also managed to persuade me to join her in a hip hop class, but it was so uncomfortable for me that I never joined her again.

I’m a natural introvert, and the things that I can do now without turning into a nervous wreck, is through years of practice and forcing myself to step out of my comfort zone. Some might think I’m a sadist for forcing myself so much, but without challenges, one cannot grow. I still cannot do a lot of things with confidence yet, but I hope that eventually I can become a well-rounded individual who is comfortable with herself in any situation. πŸ™‚